I’m writing this post because someone I know is dealing with health challenges. In fact, three — no, four — people I know, friends or family. Severe health challenges. It can be depressing, but here are some helpful offsets.
Time Magazine had a bunch of tips in this week’s issue. When you look at these suggestions, don’t be put off, as I would have been when I was younger, by the simplicity of them. As I wrote here, sometimes you can lift your mood with a simple change. And while lifting your mood won’t solve a horrible, life-threatening situation, we know by now that sometimes, living through that stuff is a matter of putting one foot in front of another, and continuing to function from one minute to the next, until you have a string that adds up to an hour or a day. I’m writing this for the people in my world who are suffering.
Here are the suggestions from Time, and if you’re interested, it’s the October 2, 2017 issue:
- Explore life without social media. Cutting back can reduce anxiety, among other benefits.
- Order delivery and send your laundry out. People report greater happiness when they buy themselves free time rather than things.
- Embrace your positive emotions as they happen. Labeling and categorizing positive emotions–i.e. examining them as they’re happening–can increase frequency and duration.
- Let go of grudges
- Visit your local tiny greenspace
- Keep your friends as close as your family
- Deploy random acts of kindness
- Write a thank-you note
- Snap a smartphone photo. It’ll refocus your attention significantly.
- Drop almost everything (stop multitasking)
- Get some sun.
- Jot down what you’re grateful for.
- Think about doing someone a favor. Helps almost as much as actually doing it.
- Do a mini meditation.
- Buy tickets to/plan events. People get more joy from experiences than things, and many memories sweeten with time.
Although age has no lock on illness, sadness, and grief, we do tend to experience it more as we get older. Even having to deal with new limitations can be a drag. So it’s good to have strategies for staying mentally strong.
Also, in our efforts to look, act, sound, and feel young, we sometimes forget that simply being sentient and, optimally, vertical, is a blessing to be grateful for. Here is a post I wrote called Getting Old is a Privilege. Because sometimes we forget what really matters.
What about you? Do you have some strategies for dealing with sadness and pain? Please share.
PS: last week, I wrote about staying brave as we age. My funny and thoughtful friend Roxanne Jones shared a link to her own post on the same topic that she wrote in 2015. You can read it here.
Lynne, this is a wonderful list. I have been battling with my chronic illness and have had to take a break from writing and reading because my brain fog wouldn’t allow me to focus. It is so nice to be able to return to the world of written words, especially yours. I would add go for a walk to the Time Magazine list. Walking is so restorative for those who able to still be mobile.
Fabulous list! One thing that I’d add is to help someone else. Focusing on others helps us focus less on our situation. I had a friend who was in the hospital for an extended period of time. On most days, I would find her downstairs in the children’s wing reading a book to, or playing cards with, a bed-ridden child.
Good tip, Janis. I think it causes us to emit dopamine or some other feel-good chemical, and the reason for this is evolutionary, to encourage the survival of the species. Powerful stuff.
Like others, I have my share of health issues. My kidney function is only 30%, and other concerns have me limiting some activities. As a creative person, being able to rootle through my fabric or yarn stashes, in search of “the right combo” for another project, assists me to get out of my head for a period of time. Those projects go to give a lift to people who have more critical things going on that I do. That’s a win-win for me.
Perfect example, Ginger. When I was young, I thought certain health challenges would flat kill me, mentally anyway. How do humans go on in the face of such difficulty? And then I got older, and I learned to write novels, and I found a bit of wisdom in the community of writers. They say to write an entire book, imagine your writing sessions as driving a car across the country in the dark. You can only see as far as your headlights. So you go there. And then a little farther, over and over again, and pretty soon, you’ve completed a manuscript. Or in this case, a life, well-lived. Thanks for weighing in.
So much wisdom and down-to-earth practicality here! #2 and #15 especially resonated with me—it all comes down to treasuring our experiences rather than things!
That’s what the experts say, Diane. Experiences make us happier than things!
Hi Lynne! Happy Friday 🙂 This is a GREAT post and I’m really tempted to ask if I can use this on my site as a Guest Post because it is awesome. I completely agree with ALL of these suggestions and the only thing I would add is something I read this morning and just posted on Facebook about Blue Zones. They said about the Blue Zone in Costa Rica, “Although Costa Ricans suffer the same hardships as we do, they use humor to get by. When news makes them angry, social media erupts in jokes. Try watching a funny video on YouTube. It can reduce stress as effectively as 20 minutes on the treadmill–and lift your spirits. ” ~Kathy
Kathy, I’d be honored! Use it any way you like. And that thing about laughing at YouTube videos? Just yesterday I told a family member to try that. Some evenings, when I’m too blue or down to read or watch TV or do anything, I sit and watch Bill Maher or any number of comics. And I do that in my car, too. Thanks for a great tip!
Thanks, Lynne for a great list. Every one of those is so important to remember. And I would add one more thing – Find something new to learn. Exploring some new passion, taking up a new hobby or learning a new skill makes you feel both younger and more vibrant. And less focused on things that cause you sadness or pain.
Lynn, that is an exceptional idea. If I were greatly discouraged, that would make me feel better.
My pleasure, Roxanne. We’re in this together.
Thanks for sharing that list, Lynne–we should all post it on our mirrors, computer screens, refrigerators, bedside lamps–wherever it’ll get seen and, I hope, acted on! P.S. Thanks, too, for the shout-out on my post. XO