Hush, hold your breath
Don’t move, I can feel you
The heart waits
The mind waits
Delirious, cacophonous noise awaits movement
Dissonant chords, twanging vibrato
Delicious, drumming and humming to
Invisible, silent beats
Don’t speak, she said
Don’t make a sound, she pled
She waits
A limb quakes
I’m afraid
I’m frail
I’m full
I’m overwhelmed.
Don’t breath, she said
Her exhale rocks the sea
but all she said was
hear
me.
Isn’t that fantastic? The poem is entitled “A Voice” and it’s by Kathy Shattuck who is in my critique group. I don’t feel comfortable critiquing poetry, because poetry to me is like art – I read it for the emotional impact I feel (or don’t).
I’d like to tell you what it makes me feel, and see: Most of the poem is waiting quietly, as if a curtain is about to go up, when people shush each other good-naturedly in excitement and anticipation. The a woman steps forward, suddenly finding her strength and voice, her breath rocking the sea with the power of this simple demand: Hear me.
Kindle readers can contact me at Lmspreen@yahoo.com.
All I can say is WOW! It seems as if it was written for me. But it obviously speaks to so many. Which is why I can only say WOW. This is getting printed and going up on my board. Thank you for sharing it Lynne.
Thank you so much for commenting, Delana. I know Kathy will be thrilled that you enjoyed it. Best wishes.
Kathy, it is so beautiful.
It’s a beautiful poem – thank you for sharing it!
And thank you, Becke, for letting us know you enjoyed it.
Thank you Lynne, and everyone…for these kind words. I’m glad I was able to share it with you – you all have made my day, as writers are prone to say!
I really enjoy listening to the feedback. Poetry can mean so much (or little) to so many, but I rarely am able to hear it, until now.
At our writers group, last week, I asked our participants to read this poem to themselves. A dull silence hit the table, and then reverberated off the ceiling and walls…. There was a reason for my asking this. But, I was told (with a smile) to read it aloud….being said that poetry was meant to be read out loud. I wanted to disagree, vehemently, but I smiled and read my poem, instead. I wanted to shout….this isn’t performance art!
It is hard to critique poetry. I know this. I only want people to feel what I write, and if it’s a poem to be read carefully, as a lot of my work is in metaphor…I don’t want my speaking voice to interfere with feelings and thoughts of readers.
So, I thank you all so much for feeling and sharing these personal moments, and listening to your own heart speak to you.
Kathy
aka: Kathleen Sara Shattuck
I can so relate to Kathy’s Poem…She reached my core…Thank you…I did share it on twitter..What better place…..
Thanks so much, Susan. I will make sure she knows. It rocked me, too. Appreciate your comment.
Beautiful. I thought of my inner voice. So often I am lost in a sea of noise and fail to listen to that still small voice inside of me that guides me. Sometimes I even forget she is there…thank you for reminding me.
Amazing
The ending shocked me… I thought it was winding towards something BIG, instead it moved to something PROFOUND.
Thank you for sharing and kudos to Kathy.
Don’t we all want to be heard, Lynne, especially in these days of noise and clamoring and confusion and fear? Beautiful poem and I know just what you mean about feeling hesitant in critiquing poetry!
Took my breath away~ profoundly beautiful,Kathy. Thanks for sharing,Lynne. I especially appreciate it on my first day of retirement 🙂
beautiful!