“Mom’s House” by mattbeccemjay
You’ve dragged in the boxes of Christmas decorations from the garage, attic, basement, or storage unit how many times now? You’ve hiked around tree lots or unfurled the fake tree for how many years? Maybe it’s time for a change.
You may love the holiday hustle, but I’m getting lazier in that respect. I like decorating for the holidays, but I don’t want to go to as much trouble anymore.
Which brings up a side issue: have you noticed how useful it is to be able to say, “I’m too old to…” or “I’ve been doing that for so many years…” or “At my age, I don’t have to…” If you haven’t yet played the OPC (Old Person Card), I recommend it. Don’t be afraid to let your freak flag fly. It’s handy at times, if you’re not too proud to use it.
But I digress.
We graduated to a fake Christmas tree about ten years ago. Last year, I pulled it out of storage and it was so raggedy I tossed it. Bill and I decided not to replace it. We were giddy with our new freedom! Could we really have a house with no Christmas tree? Then we saw a logical reason: it would be smart to make that change before the grandbabies get old enough to expect one or feel sad about its absence.
So we strung lights on the patio, arranged holiday centerpieces on tables, and hung a wreath over the fireplace. It looked beautiful and was a lot easier to set up and put away. We even had Christmas dinner for eight, not counting the babies. Everybody had fun and nobody complained about the lack of a tree.
This year, I’m going to see if the Christmas tree lot has boughs they’ll sell or give me, and I plan to array them on my dining and coffee tables, decorated by ornaments. If they don’t have a big enough pine fragrance, I can always count on my candles. The most fragrant pine scent I’ve found is Frasier Fir by Thymes. Instead of smelling like Pine Sol, the candles have a nice undertone of cedar and sandalwood. It’s really rich. I love it. (Note to marketers: please don’t ask. I don’t do ads.)
So I’m turning into a holiday minimalist. I’m not a Scrooge. I’m just too old to go to a lot of trouble.
How about you? Have you changed the way you deal with the holiday season, now that, as an adult, you’ve enjoyed fifty or sixty of them?
My husband and I moved into a rental last year just before Christmas, and amid still unpacked boxes I put up a small table top tree. I thought I was going to hate that little tree, but you know what — I Loved It! Prelit so no aggravating lights to untangle, a few special ornaments and Wa La. I’m not quite ready to give up the tree yet but I may be heading in that direction. I just want to say thank you for this blog, it was especially what I needed today. I was opening the door to my own little pity party when I found your site and have closed that door, at least for today. Thanks
Kris, that makes me very happy! Glad to help. Stop by any time. We do a new topic every Friday.
When I moved into my Condo, I invited my Kids, their two boys over for Dinner one Fall evening.
My Grandsons are 12 & 7 years old.
When they got here I had all my boxes of decorations out, let them go through them and pick the ones they wanted for themselves. I had prepared special Christmas boxes personalized for each of the four of them with a banner saying, “Muggles everlasting Christmas gift for (Insert their names here).” Muggle is what my grands have always called me.
Then I asked them all to go out and purchase one very special decoration (arrangement etc) as a Christmas gift for me to decorate my new home and I would always have a part of them to make my home Especially Christmassy. (is that a word? LOL)
They got their treasures, I donated the rest to the homeless shelter and everyone is happy.
What amazed me, is that the specific decorations that actually had a lot of sentimental value were the ones chosen by my family.
It was a win win situation we all now have something we love and treasure, I downsized, and everyone came away with happy thoughts.
Not once has anyone said “You need a tree.” LOL
I love that! Your grandkids are lucky to have such a creative grandma, Kathleen. And you always write such thoughtful comments.
Christmas has always been a big stressor in my life, whether it was my X’s drinking and never knowing what he might do next, or the worry of not enough money as a single Mom when I finally had the courage to leave. Now the kids are grown and have their own families and my “new” husband of 37 years and I try to down play the season as much as we can. Decorations are minimal and last year I did all my shopping on the Internet, it was wonderful all gift wrapped and delivered at the click of a mouse. The gifts were simple PJs, sweaters and slippers, the older kids got gift cards and the young ones Legos. Everyone had a good time and seemed to like their gift and if they didn’t well too bad, it’s a gift! We all have way more than we need and I’m thinking about giving World Vision Christmas gifts in each Adult’s name and the kids are all old enough for gift cards this year. Keep it simple is my motto!
Lynda, your comment resonates, because I remember the last few years of our gift exchange, I would rather we spent the money on people who needed it, rather than ourselves. None of us was rich, but we could afford to go out and buy what we needed. My heart wasn’t in it. So I am glad now to skip that part.
I find the white lights soothing, but now that kids have grown and flown, I no longer feel compelled decorate for any holiday. If I do get the artificial tree out and up, it will stay standing in all its glory until Easter. ha
Well, that would certainly justify the effort, Pat!
Wow, what a great discussion you’ve started Lynne. I’ve been thinking about Christmas already as well. With two adult sons and their wives, I never know what to get them for gifts so I always ask what they “need.” That makes me feel guilty because I should “know” what they want or need. Now, I say, no need.I plan on discussing with them the idea of gifts for our grandchildren only–and homemade if I can swing it. The kids have so much stuff, I don’t see the point in adding anything more unless it comes from my heart. This year, I want to knit each of them a cap to wear in the snow when we go to Mammoth in February. First I need to get together with Mom for a refresher course.
As far as decorations, I have a Santa collection that my mother started me on when she worked in a card store 20 years ago. Last year, I parted with some of them just because they held no sentimental value for me. I plan to part with more this year, even if they’re sentimental, because I do want to simplify. I’m allowing enjoyment of my love of nature at this stage in my life and would feel real satisfaction in filling the house with natural boughs (good idea BTW), pomegranates, holly berries and the like. Downsize? Absolutely. Playing the OC–not so much. I still love to decorate for Christmas, just want to change the focus of the decor and the focus of the season from stressing over giving the perfect gift to relaxing and giving my heart.
Merry Christmas to all!
We’ve had a “traditional, European style” (my descriptor!) Christmas for many many years: Minimal and quiet. Gifts for small children, some mad money for the older children, and an evergreen potted plant from outside and fragrant boughs or wreaths IF children or work friends are coming over. I look forward to easier, not more stressful, days as the holidays approach. No one has EVER complained as they sip eggnog by the fire and play tables games. I heartily endorse your new behavior, but I want everyone to know that one needn’t have an “old card” to play before doing this. Just call it “traditional, European style.” 😉
I like it!
My husband has joined me in retirement since last December, so this year we won’t be having a Christmas party for his employees or co-workers. Hoorah! It’s not that I minded having people over to the house, but those two parties were a lot of work–year after year. And since we won’t be hosting all those folks, I’m sure we will decorate much less. Yes, I’ll use the red tablecloth and Christmas-y table runner, and I’m sure we’ll put the wreath on the front door. But I’m hoping we can ditch the tree (maybe get a tabletop tree?) and get rid of just about everything else. I’m feeling lighter just thinking about that!
Sandy, what a workload you’ve had. What a relief to unload that sucker. Now you can do exactly as you wish. (I watched the Princess Bride last night again, and that phrase is stuck now in my mind!)
My favorite part of Christmas decorating has long been the feeling you get when you put it all away and everything looks clean and familiar. Now I like to put lights up on the windows that cast a beautiful glow in the house but that’s it. It is so freeing to be a minimalist.
Me too, love the little white lights.
Headed out the door right now – meeting someone to deliver some of my Christmas decorations sold on Craig’s List! It took me a while to realize that having boxes and boxes of Christmas decorations, taking up place in a STORAGE SHED was only adding to my stress! So I’m minimizing, and only keeping the few really special pieces! It’s a freeing experience, and I’ll make a few bucks…
That’s perfect! Good for you. How freeing.
I’m down to two boxes, but I love the Craig’s list idea!!!
Nanci, AnyShinyThing scores again: idea sharing.
I’m excited to offload some stuff this year when I open up the boxes and decorate. Some of the baubles were only bought for the color they’d add to the tree. I can 86 them and keep the ones that are really sentimental, like the ones my mom made.
I love downsizing!
We haven’t put up a tree in years. A few nice decorations here and there and we are done! That decision and our family’s no-gift policy makes the season much more fun.
Janis, we used to do a gift exchange just for adults, and then everybody bought whatever they wanted for the kids. Now the adults don’t exchange anything (except Mom usually gets things, like gift certificates to the craft store). It’s much more enjoyable.
We elected to go with a small tabletop tree with minimal decorations about eight years ago. This year, now that we are back in the homeland and hosting the kids for Christmas, I’m debating which way to go. One son will be aghast if we don’t have a full sized tree for sure and surely we need a tree for the grandchildren, right? Not sure what I’ll do yet bu it does irritate me that it’s the beginning of November and I’m already thinking about this!
Linda, that’s kind of a barometer, that irritating feeling of “have to”. I have a wicked thought that maybe you should buy and hang a poster of a full-sized tree 😉
It was 1989 (25 years ago) when my husband and I decided to join a church that did not “observe Christmas” in the traditional sense. Christmas memories of those years do not exist. However, I have very clear memories of traveling to distant lands…England, Kenya and Australia were among the places we visited with our sons during the years we did not “observe Christmas.”
Later, the church actually went through a “transformation” where it became a “choice” to do Christmas…or not.
After having “stepped away” from the traditions…my choice was to not go back to the way I had done Christmas before.
It’s all about choice. If people “love” the hustle and bustle…I say, “Go for it!”
Personally, the love and goodness that people express during the holidays, is something I strive to enjoy and appreciate in my life everyday.
I love peace and serenity and family time.
Sue, what an interesting background you describe. But yes, you are right, it should be all about choice. What a concept!