Did you know there are now 26 different meds to help men get an erection, and yet nothing to help women’s sexual performance? I’m not surprised. Men were easy. Women? Ha. See, for men, all you have to do is increase blood flow to a few inches of tissue. Men are always horny; they just need the tools to work.
Women, however, don’t need erections. They need horniness. What can a scientist invent to make a woman horny? Well, first, more time in a day and more energy. Most women have a to-do list a mile long and sex isn’t always at the top (putting it diplomatically.) Also, the scientist could invent a pill to change modern culture so women felt good about themselves even if they have normal womanly bodies and aren’t even half as hot as Caitlyn Jenner.
But more importantly, once you get them naked, women and men’s brains work differently. Women are hard-wired for multitasking, while men are hard-wired for hardness. The erection cuts off blood flow to the brain, apparently, and they can totally focus on the task at hand.
Women’s brains, however, never shut off like that. While she’s trying to enjoy herself, her brain wants to focus on everything else in her life. Thoughts of job, home, kids – ugh! don’t think of the kids right now! – emails, grocery shopping, returning phone call to parents – ugh! don’t think of parents! – getting that report done on time, what to wear to meeting, calling phone company about overcharge…
To get women horny, all you need is a pill to slow down their brains.
And it seems they have! Somehow, while overmedicating us with anti-depressives, Big Pharma discovered that users of one medication, flibanserin, reported a teeny, tiny little increase (.005 to 1%) in sexual desire. Well, look out, world! We have a breakthrough! Viagra for women! And all it took was a pill that changes women’s brain chemistry. I mean, doesn’t that just solve the Venus:Mars debate once and for all?
OTOH, maybe there’ a simpler solution than putrifying our magnificent gray matter with chemicals:
From the Porn for Women series of books.
Okay, I imagine a lot of women would be thrilled to be able to take a pill and feel more lustful. And I hope someday they do, and said pill doesn’t involve side effects like fatigue, low blood pressure and fainting.
Just for fun, here’s Ellen on the subject. (If you’re in a hurry, skip the first 30 seconds, which is the current stupid Viagra commercial, to get to Ellen’s parody of it):
The paradox that surrounds antidepressant is that they kill the desire for sex almost entirely. It is very sad.
b+
I know! Isn’t that ironic. I mean, if anything would add to your depression, not being able to have an orgasm definitely would.
You nailed it (you should pardon the expression)!